I feel overwhelmingly blessed
To have a wonderful family, a loving man, crazy friends, a welcoming school, awesome opportunities, and amazing life.
Even though I’m an estranged awful person, God has been very nice to me.
It would happen that when I visit the boy while he’s on rounds, I’m the one who notices a weed incident first while heading to the ladies room.
When I told him, he whined why I told him. I laughed.
But I would get an incident while not on rounds.
Another filipino family party. But this time it was a debut. It was so good to meet new people but also to find out about the old kids I used to play with back in the day.
They’ve grown up so much- but they’re still the same. I wonder if it’s the same for me.
Parties are an interesting situation where they feel like fast forwarded chapters of your life. A lot happening within the span of a few hours because it’s a completely different environment with people you know you’ll never see again. Bittersweet, awkward, and wonderful.
People might think I’m extroverted, but I’m just a person who likes to act like I am. Because when I pretend, I meet a lot of awesome people I wouldn’t have if I never opened my mouth.
Now I don’t feel like going to bed.
Me: that's the way of going about it
Me: because everything on Earth is precious
Me: even if I'm disgusted by half of it
"What do you want from me, I’m just an undergrad!"
I said this over the phone in my dream during a nightmare. In my dream, my first choice internship coordinator called me, and told me I simply did not have enough experience to take the position.
Although the reality of that situation ended up becoming a happy ending, I can’t help but feel that way with how my life is right now. But I’m being productive with my time along with being busy. There’s not much more I can do with my time without losing sleep and being miserable (which I just think isn’t the way to go).
However I can’t help but feel in my bones I should do something more. In particular with volunteering with women’s organizations or the Philippines… or something.
Lent last year didn’t work out so well. I had drive and then burnt out within the second week. So this year I’ll try to do it on a more doable basis and hopefully be able to continue doing so once Lent ends.
1-2x a week. I got this.
My religious life/drive has been on a downward spiral. It’s ironic that theology classes make it less appealing in a spiritual way. In a sociological/historical perspective, it is much more interesting. Ah well. We’ll see what we can do.
Bananas, honey, peanut butter, and toasted wheat bread= most delicious thing ever.